The Sweetest Sweet Magnolias Quotes – Seasons 1 and 2

As soon as I heard the first, “Bless your heart” on Sweet Magnolias, I was waiting to see what other delicious southern Sweet Magnolias quotes I would hear. And they did not disappoint. Southern women have a way with words, epsecially Helen. Enjoy these quotes from Sweet Magnolias from Helen, Maddie, Dana Sue, and more from Seasons 1 and 2!

Best Sweet Magnolias Quotes on Netflix

When you get a bunch of friends who gab, you’re bound to get some great one-liners. Sweet Magnolias is about three childhood best friends living in a small town, Serenity, South Carolina. They support each other through the good times and the bad. 

I am not Southern, so I can’t tell you whether these Sweet Magnolias quotes are accurate or whether Southerners actually use some of these phrases, but I appreciate some of the snarky sentiments as well as the wise advice.

Check out some of these quotes from favorite characters like Maddie, Helen, Dana Sue, and even snakey Mary Vaughn. They are friendship goals.

While you’re busy hanging price tags, Bill Townsend, keep in mind that you aren’t worth the skin God spent to wrap your bones in. You best pray he doesn’t regret his investment in you as much as I regret mine. -Maddie

Maddie, this is hard, but you will persevere. -Helen

Seriously, first a baseball star and now a theater star. Am I even worthy to walk to school with the two of you? -Annie

Ooh, bless your heart. Go ahead then and work your magic. -Dana Sue

Okay, so because of what happened with your dad, you are gonna mock this whole town which is filled with good people just doing their best to get through the day?  -Dana Sue

Go upstairs before you say something that I will make you regret. -Maddie

I’ve only seen one play. It was beautiful. It was called Cats. -Noreen
But that was a musical. It’s not real theater. -Kyle

I will not have a man who lies in this kitchen or in my life. -Dana Sue

I will stop pushing, but I will not stop worrying. It is how I express my love. -Helen

And, Peggy, I hope that for the benefit of an informed populace, you will cover this public meeting in your role as a deputy editor of our paper and not in the role of Mary Vaughn’s best friend. -Helen

No rest for the weary. -Helen
Or the wicked. -Erik

Gossip travels like grease through a goose in this town. -Maddie

Pipes in the walls upstairs have been leaking. Corroded everything. Soaked down through the walls, seeped into the floorboards like deceit in a soul. -Skeeter

Today was a weird day. -Cal
What, like polka-dotted fish with two heads weird or like not everybody likes Beyonce weird? -Trotter

You two feel free to continue this little Tiger Beat meeting without me. -Helen

Six of one, half dozen the other. -Helen

Well my, my, aren’t we living in high cotton? -Mary Vaughn

Do the storms ever stop? -Helen
No. But neither do the rainbows. -Maddie

You are bound and determined to make me as fat as a tick. -Helen

Everyone is entitled to be sad, but no one should be sad alone.

My life is a mess. I’m holding it together with duct tape and happy thoughts, and I’m running out of both. -Maddie

Best Season 2 Sweet Magnolias Quotes

The three best friends are back in Season 2 and are still dropping some Southern wisdom. 

Just because you don’t want it to happen it doesn’t make it your fault it did. -Ronnie

It’s been a bad night. But mornin’s coming and everyone will mend eventually – Helen

Few good decisions are made between midnight and dawn. -Helen

You are busier than a cat in a room full of rocking chairs and you keep adding chairs. -Ronnie

The best mother in the world cannot protect her child from every hurt. -Maddie’s mom

The devil may make work for idle hands, but he accomplishes even more with empty minds. -Helen

I wouldn’t trust a woman who puts raisins in her potato salad either. -Helen

You know pushing past pain means usually not dealing with it. -Erik

Did I miss any of your favorite quotes from Sweet Magnolias in Seasons 1 or 2? Drop them in the comments below!